Guy Ritchie's 1999 hit comedy/crime film Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels remains one of my favorite British gangster movies.
A botched card game in London triggers four friends, thugs, weed-growers, hard gangsters, loan sharks and debt collectors to collide with each other in a series of unexpected events, all for the sake of weed, cash and two antique shotguns.
Let me take you eight of my favorite quotes from Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels.
A botched card game in London triggers four friends, thugs, weed-growers, hard gangsters, loan sharks and debt collectors to collide with each other in a series of unexpected events, all for the sake of weed, cash and two antique shotguns.
Let me take you eight of my favorite quotes from Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels.
1. Right. Let's sort the buyers from the spyers....
Right. Let's sort the buyers from the spyers, the needy from the greedy,
and those who trust me from the ones who don't, because if you can't
see value here today, you're not up here shopping. You're up here
shoplifting.
You see these goods? Never seen daylight, moonlight, Israelite. Fanny by the gaslight. Take a bag, c'mon take a bag. I took a bag home last night. Cost me a lot more than ten pound, I can tell you.
Anyone like jewelry? Look at that one there. Handmade in Italy, hand-stolen in Stepney. It's as long as my arm. I wish it was as long as something else. Don't think because these boxes are sealed up, they're empty. The only man who sells empty boxes is the undertaker, and by the look of some of you lot today, I'd make more money with me measuring tape. Here, one price. Ten pound. - Bacon
You see these goods? Never seen daylight, moonlight, Israelite. Fanny by the gaslight. Take a bag, c'mon take a bag. I took a bag home last night. Cost me a lot more than ten pound, I can tell you.
Anyone like jewelry? Look at that one there. Handmade in Italy, hand-stolen in Stepney. It's as long as my arm. I wish it was as long as something else. Don't think because these boxes are sealed up, they're empty. The only man who sells empty boxes is the undertaker, and by the look of some of you lot today, I'd make more money with me measuring tape. Here, one price. Ten pound. - Bacon
2. It's a deal. It's a steal. It's the sale of the fucking century.
Dunno, Tom. Seems expensive. - Nick The Greek
Seems? Well, this seems to be a waste of my time. That is 900 nicker in any shop you're lucky enough to find one in. And you're complaining about 200? What school of finance did you study? It's a deal, it's a steal, it's the sale of the fucking century. In fact, fuck it, Nick, I think I'll keep it! - Tom
Seems? Well, this seems to be a waste of my time. That is 900 nicker in any shop you're lucky enough to find one in. And you're complaining about 200? What school of finance did you study? It's a deal, it's a steal, it's the sale of the fucking century. In fact, fuck it, Nick, I think I'll keep it! - Tom
3. Shotguns? What, like guns that fire shot?
Shotguns? What, like guns that fire shot? - Garry
Oh, you must be the brains of the operation. Yes, guns that fire shot. - Barry the Baptist
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Oh, you must be the brains of the operation. Yes, guns that fire shot. - Barry the Baptist
4. What do you mean armed? Armed with what?
They’re armed. - Eddie
What was that? Armed? What do you mean armed? Armed with what? - Soap
Err, bad breath, colorful language, feather duster… what do you think they’re gonna be armed with? Guns, you tit! - Eddie
What was that? Armed? What do you mean armed? Armed with what? - Soap
Err, bad breath, colorful language, feather duster… what do you think they’re gonna be armed with? Guns, you tit! - Eddie
5. If the milk turns out to be sour, I ain't the kind of pussy to drink it.
But just let me tell you
one thing...
If the milk turns out to be sour, I ain't the kind of pussy to drink it. D'you know what I mean? - Rory Breaker
If the milk turns out to be sour, I ain't the kind of pussy to drink it. D'you know what I mean? - Rory Breaker
6. If you don't want to be counting the fingers you haven't got....
If you don't want to be counting the fingers you haven't got, I suggest you get those shooters. Quick! - Barry The Baptist
7. Charles get the rifle out. We're being fucked!
Charles. Get the rifle out. We're being fucked! - Winston
8. It's been emotional.
It's been emotional. - Big Chris
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